The older a loner gets the more displaced they get from the social world that eludes them. When the loner was younger, he/she put effort into other people, but after years being flaked on, used financially, rejected, ignored, and perceived as invisible to other people they often conclude that their efforts to maintain their appearance is futile. As a result, they let themselves go and spiral down into a cycle that is extremely difficult to stop.
Aging and continued social rejection experiences positively correlates with:
While a rejected adult may look somewhat "put together" when they are young, as they age (particularly after age 30), their appearance drops dramatically.
The reasoning for this is that as the years go by, it becomes obvious to them that they have virtually “nothing to lose” by over indulging themselves. Instead of trying to find enjoyment through social interaction (which eluded them in the past), they gain it through food overconsumption.
As the person gains weight, they automatically become very unattractive meaning there is no reason to keep up with grooming habits anymore because people are going to find them sexually unattractive either way for being fat. You will see more fat men with unkempt hair and neck beards than men who are in shape.
The rejected loner will gain a big belly (both men and women) which is extremely uncomfortable. As such, they will gravitate towards clothing that attempts to alleviate this discomfort. Fat people clothing includes jogging pants, moo moos, lose fitting track pants, and shorts and pants with rubber bands instead of buttons to keep them on. This is normally a progressive process that does not happen overnight, but in various stages.
The life stages of friendless and romantically rejected adults as they get older:
STAGE 1: Years of social rejection while trying to maintain appearance (often late teens and early 20s)
STAGE 2: Loner realizes the effort is not worth it and gets into food (often mid – late 20s to 30s)
STAGE 3: Weight increases each year as food intake increases (30s – 40s)
Appearance no longer attractive regardless of grooming habits and clothes (30s – 40s)
STAGE 4: Clothes no longer comfortable so loner switches to even less attractive attire (30 – 40s). They still think someday they will change their habits and lose the weight.
STAGE 5: Appearance declines to the point of no return. Depression ensures which is sometimes clinically treated with pills (40s – 50s).
STAGE 6: They have lost virtually all hope for an improved future. They are bloated, their health is noticeably declining, and it is patently obvious that their best years have been wasted. (50+)
The dreams of success are replaced with depression with each birthday, friendless new year's eve, and lack of accomplishments
While the young socially rejected adults (20s) can find personal satisfaction through hope and promise for the future, as the years go by and things get worse and worse, it becomes obvious that their dreams never came true. They look at other people who are the same age or are younger who found the success, friends, family, and accomplishment that they believed would happen to them and slowly it starts to set in that this will never happen. What was once an obvious bright future (early 20s) starts to seem unrealistic as the loner gets into their later 20s. In their 30s, they realize that the things they wanted and dreamed of never materialised and the decline begins.
Depression levels rise as the loner slowly realizes the vision they had for their future will not happen. This is often compounded by the loner having worked hard to achieve a college education or training that turned out to be a waste of time and money. They “did everything right” but all that time and effort was wasted. Sometimes the loner will seek professional help and take antidepressants like Lexapro/Cipralex to try to feel happy again. Desperate to enjoy life, they self indulge.
- Facebook depressing
- Everyone else is busy
- Slow responses to texts
- "I have no friends"
- Indicators of social rejection
- Depressed by old pictures
- People don't initiate contact
- Having no social circle
- Fat people with no friends
- Never invited places
- Lonely people who stop trying
- Aging and friendlessness
- Fears and problems
- Rejection by flaking
- Dating: men vs. women
Identity and Backgrounds